You've changed so much
by whitemetal01
Summary: When Beast Boy goes away on a trip,will Raven be ok? And what will Beast Boy be like when he returns? Rated PG-13 in case i decide to do something violent
1. Default Chapter

*Ok, i do NOT own Teen Titans. T_T  
  
Chapter 1: A sweet goodbye  
  
"Uh...what time is it?" It's a bright morning at the T tower. We see a girl smothered with blankets and pillows in a cute purple tank top and bottom. The gem on her forehead glitters in the sun. This is Raven. " Is it...time yet?" Ray yawed and started sluggishly getting out of her cozy modern bed. Her beautiful violet hair looked like a jungle.She had even more black marks under her eye than usual. " Wait...something important was happening today..." She thought. It wasnt her birthday, or christmas..."oh...no..." As if given a jolt of energy,the psychic started getting dressed frantically, hoping she wasnt to late for the big event. " My hair looks like crap...but theres no more time! I have to go now!" tossing down her hairbrush in frustration,Raven rushed down the stairs and into the living room.Which was ironic,since nothing that was "living" was in there. " They wouldn't have left without me...would they?" She didnt give herself enough time to answer that question before she was out the door and in the sky. She swooped over the city and into a small building. There,in the lobby,she finally saw her fellow Teen Titans. "Raven! You are here! We must celebrate once we get home! ...oh.Then i suppose we'll have to celebrate us GOING home...you don't mind two celebrations,do you?" The questioner was a tall,thin girl with large,seaweed eyes and scarlet locks.This is Starfire. " Its not a big deal,Starfire." Ray casually strode over to a huge,hulking man with blue and grey mechanical parts and a red eye.This is Cyborg. "So...wheres the traveler?"She inquired. " Went to the Bathroom." He replied." He always gets sick before flights." " ...hmm..." the other male there was a boy with lovely black hair and a mysterious face mask.This is Robin. " We really didn't expect you to make it,Raven.It's not like you to sleep in." Raven blinked a few times. " Well,I was...thinking about a lot last night..." It was visible that Ravens face was becoming saggy and depressed. " Oooooooooooaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaa..." Just then came an awful moaning from the hallway.Soon,a small boy came into view,clutching his stomach. " I feel like...shit...." The boys normally green face was now even MORE green from sickness.This is Beast Boy. " Maybe...you should lie down." Offered Robin."Raven!!" Beast Boy yelled,seemingly cured. "Your here!" "Well,duh.Like I'd miss something like this." She said with a small smile. Suddenly,a loud voice came booming over the intercom: Flight 239 for Cairo Egypt,now boarding!!" " I guess I'd better be going then..." The green boy started to turn when a pale hand shot out to grasp his.He swung around to find it was Raven. " You...can't leave without my present,Beast Boy." She gentley placed a letter in his small palm."And...this." She leaned over just slightly,and gave Beast Boy a quick kiss on the cheek. Beast Boy turned Redder than a radish. " You can read it on the plane." She added. "...Thanks. Ray." All 4 of the remaning Titans waved goodbye as Beast Boy climbed onto the plane,tripping every few steps,obviouley still a bit stunned by Ravens sudden show of emotions. But eventually he made it on,and the Titans stayed there until the aircraft could no longer be seen.A single tear fell from Raven's delicate eyes.Then,a payphone blew up,surprising everyone but Raven and the Titans,who were all too used to it.  
  
The small boy sat inpatiently in the plane."hey, I should open Ray's note now! Not like I'm rich with options...It's either read,sleep or eat, and I've already done the last two...a couple of times." He thought. He slowley dug the letter out from his bag and lightley broke the wax seal of a raven.  
  
-Dear Beast Boy-  
I'll bet your on the plane right now,reading this since you've already eaten and drank. Anyways, I just thought I'd let you know that I'll miss you for this entire year. I dont know how I'm going to get through,but I'll wait for you...as long as you need,ok? I guess its too much to ask that you try to get a tan...I bet I would't even notice. Heh heh... And remember: Africa's full of dangerous things! I know i shouldn't baby you,but...maybe if you worked out a little,you wouldn't get hurt so easily...Your just Skin and bones as it is...well, anyways, I guess I'll see you when you get back. I love you.  
  
Rav-  
  
"I can't quite make out her name." Upon further inspection,he found it looked like a drop of water had smuged the ink. " She must have been crying while she was writing this..." He held the letter to his heart. " I love you,eh? ...I love you too."  
  
* ALL RIGHT!! Sounds good for a first Fic,huh? Anyways,Dont worry,next chapter I'll skip right to one year from now. Like I'd make you wait....Anyways,please R&R! 


	2. alone,alone,alone

Heyas!! Yes,its here! Chapter 2,since if i didnt,i would die. Thanks for all your kind comments!  
  
Chapter 2: Alone,Alone,Alone  
  
The sun was beginning to fade and the stars were beginning to gleam as the T car cruised silentley towards the T tower. Cyborg at the wheel, Star in the capitans chair (Fooling with all the buttons) And The 2 R's in the backseat. Raven said nothing, but nothing short of a chainsaw could cut through the sorrow in that air. Robin just sat,looking somewhat concerned. Finally,Raven spoke:" I...I love him." This got Robins attention. 'I love him,don't I,Robin? More than anything in the world..." Raven started tearing up,until she had to press her face into her palms to stop all the water. Robin slowley placed a hand on her hunched sholder out of compassion. " It's true. And I know it's going to be hard,but...before you know it,he'll be back here, bouncing off the walls like he always does." This brought the smallest kind of smile to Ravens face,but she was still happy her friend was consoling her. " It feels like it's been days already." " I-" BEEEEEEEPPPPPPPP!!! Came the blare from the front of the car. "....What....the....hell..."raven looked like she might explode. It seems Starfire pressed one button too many. " Oh my! This button makes a wonderful noise,doesn't it, Robin??" She pressed it a few more times before Raven bound her hands together with a psychic bubble. " Well,here we are,y'all!" called Cyborg. Sure enough,they were back at the giant tower,but it looked like the last building on earth. There was no life in it,and no life would be coming in. Raven quickley jumped out and flew slowley around to the back of the T,and in through her open window.After closing it,she walked to her bed,and with a thud, fell onto it like an anvil. Meanwhile,the group was beginning to prepare dinner,which was supposed to be Pasta and salad,until Starfire accidentley melted the oven, at which point the menu changed to cold pizza. Which was fine with Cyborg. "I do not think Raven enjoys cold european foods,but I shall bring her a cup of tea and perhaps some mustard." Starfire stated. Both robin and Cyborg looked like were going to thorw up.Cyborg did. " Uh,I think you can skip the mustard,Star.But I'm sure she'll appreciate some tea." Robin smiled approvingley. Happily,Starfire skipped up to Ravens room with the earl Grey,when she heard uncontrolable sobbing. Inside the dark dwelling,Raven was holding a small stuffed Raven with a tag that said: Ray- Happy Birthday! From-BB Each time she looked at it it seemed she would never stop crying. Starfire cautiousley walked into the room with her tea. ".....Raven?" Raven did not reply. " Um,I, er...I brought you some tea. I hope you like Earl Brown." Raven sat up slightley,sniffling." It's earl GREY,Starfire" Starfire looked embarrased. ' Oh." Raven thankfully took the cup from the girl and started sipping it slowley. "...Beast Boy never liked Earl Grey tea...He was always happy with his over-sugered soda...I guess I thought that was cute..." The tears started dripping into her drink with a small splash.Starfire sat down next to her friend. " Raven. I love Robin. I love him more than a Marflarp loves Galaflax...but I do not know what it is like to have him a thousand miles away. I can only imagine...and for this I am sorry.You love Beast Boy even more than I love Robin.You are...meant to be together.But...would he want you to be here,crying on his behalf?" Raven looked both shocked and soothed.She wiped away her tears and said with a smile: " Your right,Starfire.Beast Boy would not want me sitting here feeling sorry for myself.I'll try to understand that this is important to him and his future,but...I feel like I'm the only one who just can't accept it." Starfire gave Raven a hug that seemed to last forever. And Raven did not resist: she truely needed someone to cry on.They stayed there for so long...until what seemed like the end of time. Until finally Raven pulled away. " I can't mope any longer." She looked confidentley into the sky. " I'm waiting for you."  
  
NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!HOW CAN I LEAVE IT HERE??!!?!??!? Oh,calm down....me.-_- the 2nd and third chapters were submitted together. No muss,no fuss. Ok,this time really: Chapter 3: Beast Boy finally comes home! 


	3. welcome home! BeastMan?

Chapter 3: Welcome Home! Beast...Man?  
  
YAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWNNNNNNN!!!! Yes,it's Raven again. A year has passed since Beast Boy left and her heart nearley broke in two. "Uh.What time is it?" She glanced at her clock. " 6:00..." Giving a sigh of relief, Raven got dressed into her best outfit: ( starfire helped pick it out for just this occasion.) It was a silky white dress with a feathered shoulder area. Around her hips she wore her lovely golden belt,and a pair of Cream shoes. She looked at herself about 13 times before going downstairs for an early breakfast. " Raven! What a wonderous dress!" Starfire felt the smooth material and nodded happily. " Yeah,you look great." Came Robin's response. " Never better" Added Cyborg. Raven blushed a deep shade of pink. " We must hurry or we will miss Beast Boy's flight!" cryed Star. ' um...It doesnt come in for another 2 hours,Star.We have plenty of time." Coaxed the confused Robin. Raven decided to take a short rest before they left. ~ Hmm...I wonder how he's changed...Oh My God...What if he's found a new girlfriend? What if he's dead? What if he doesnt like me anymore? Oh no oh no oh no!!~ Raven said this last bit out loud, puzzling the others. "Oh no oh no oh no WHAT,Raven?" Asked Starfire. "Erm.... Oh NO this legging did NOT run up!!...Phew,thats better." Raven laughed a not only uncharectaristic but unneccisary chuckle. Robin and Cyborg just shook it off. " Urg....I can't wait any longer!! We'll just have to be early!" Without another sound,The 3 other titans were in a large,black bubble trailing behind a rushed Raven who was quickley soaring down to the airport.  
  
"Oh! Is THAT him? Or THAT? Or maybe THATS him!" Starfire was obviousley on something, may it be candy,crack or soap. ( It's Starfire.) " Starfire. Look closley.Do any of those people have GREEN SKIN?? Besides,that one's a woman..." Raven looked disgusted. " I am sorry Raven, but I am just so excited to see Beast Boy!! I almost miss his...how you say..."Cheesy" jokes and...um...."Squashy sense of humor." " You mean Corny,Star." Corrected Robin. Star blushed, while Raven's attention was drawn to something else- A tall figure with what appeared to be green hair. Exstatic,she hurried over to him,only to find that it was not Beast Boy,but just some "Independent" Teenager who was making a fashion statement. Dissapointed,Raven kept scanning the crowd. Then she heard it: " Flight 239 from Cairo,Egypt,now disembarking.Luggage collection is to your right." She didn't care about the luggage,but her heart skipped 10 beats when she saw people slowley coming off. Several people had run to their family and friends,but Beast Boy was no where to be found. Worried, Raven continued to wait. She felt a tap on her shoulder,but ignored it. A few seconds later,another tap and then another. Finally,fed up,she swung around to confront the tapper. " What the hell do you wa-"  
  
Freeze.  
  
Before her stood the most gorgeous man she had ever seen. His hair was messily combed back, but there were strands sticking straight out,too. His eyes were not big,but were full of love and life. His orange shirt stopped just a slight bit above the mid section,revealing a small half an inch of his irresistably tiny tummy. He wore khaki shorts and some dark purple shoes. On the ends of his long ears were 2 small cup earrings.He gave her a smile that made her nearley melt. His teeth were all sharp save a few,but they had a feeling of gentleness. He stood about 5 finches above Raven, so that she was left staring at his chest area.His skin was a dark shade of green.  
  
Hey,Raven.  
  
Raven froze.  
  
Not just her body: Everything.Her mind froze.Her thoughts froze.Her heart froze. Until finally,she managed to choke out: " B...Be...Beas..." Before she could finish the name,she had fainted,falling to the ground with a large slam. Everythought she had ever had of Beast Boy,every image,every word...It all faded away.Slowley,Raven saw darkness. Pusr darkness. That darkness lasted forever.Until she awoke. 


	4. nervious!

Chapter 4: Nervous  
  
" Happy Birthday,Raven! I...I made this for you."..." A stuffed...crow?" ... "It's a Raven..." .. " oh,or course. It's wonderful. Thank you.um...what was your name?" .. " Have you forgotten aleady?" ... "Already? Your name...I can't remember...what is it?" ..." Silly.Its  
  
Raven awoke in a cold sweat. Her eyes were overflowing with fear. She was laying on a huge,plush couch in front of a humongous TV screen. Cords and cables lay all around. Her head felt like a basketball. She thought her eyes would fall out. She then noticed the furry ball laying by her head. She felt it softley,wondering what it was. That is, until it rose up and started speaking.  
  
YAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Whatever the thing was,it flew across the room and slamed into one of the huge,concrete walls. When it feel to the ground,Raven noticed it wasn't a ball: It was someone's head. " ...Oh my god!" Without another word,she was up and running over to the crippled person. She knelt down to help them up. A large,green face looked back at her.  
  
" Ouch...That smarts..."  
  
When he cocked his head up,he saw it was none other than Raven.  
  
" Raven!"  
  
Before Raven could get a word in,He was huggling her in his arms. Not that she minded,but she quickley pulled away. " Beast..Boy? Beast Boy..It's you...your back. Your finally back..." When they both stood up,it became strangley obvious just how much he'd grown.  
  
" wow..." Gasped Raven.  
  
" Are you feeling any better? I was worried..." Raven looked perplexed. "You fainted? Don't you remember?" She shook her head. " Oh...It was at the airport. I recognized your purple hair and thought I'd suprise you from the back...heh heh...that wasn't such a great idea,I guess." He looked both embarrased and shy. " The dress you had on...It was very cute. But then again,I think you...look good in anything..." Raven,for once in her life,was actually INTIMIDATED by the changling. A clock blew up. " Er...um...uh... Do you want to...talk downstairs? Maybe?" He happily obliged. "sure."  
  
The T tower was completely empty. Starfire and Robin had left to gather supplies for the welcoming back ceremony, which was postponed on account of Raven's sickness. Cyborg was in the gym. The two sat near the kitchen. Raven thought she'd get some drinks,but Beast Boy motioned for her to sit. " It's Ok." He said." I'll get it. You like Earl Grey,right? Me too." He smiled. Ravens mind was going haywire. " Beast Boy likes....Tea??TEA???BEAST BOY??? This is so wrong." "Uh,wouldn't you rather have a soda or something? I mean,you don't HAVE to drink tea..." The shape shifter just smiled. " Nah.It's ok. That stuffs bad for you anyways." Raven was truely shocked. "Bad for you? Since when does Beast Boy care about whats Good and Bad or you?? This is...way to wierd." He got the 2 mugs and placed one in front of Raven. Raven decided to go with a safe topic for discussion: " Um,so...how was Egypt?" BB took a big sip of the tea,and said: " Eh,I was ok. All I really did was move stuff around and lift stuff up.It was really kinda boring. Oh! Except the opening ceremony was pretty cool. You would have loved it: They lined up all the scientists and gave them each this uber cool pendant with a dragonfly in it. Like, a REAL dragon fly! I...accidently ate mine...but...oh! but then they decided that we wern't yet worthy to approach the village, so they jabbed this wierd little cuplet thinys into our ears. God! It hurt so bad! No alcohol or anything!" " He took another sip of tea. " But I think it looks kinda cool.So,I just kinda kept it in. Heh heh...Hey,are you hungry?" Raven sat up." Me? Oh.um...yeah,I guess..." Beast Boy took her hand. "...Then lets go." Raven experienced a new feeling at that second: Love.True,undying love. She had to stand on her tip-toes,but she eventually planted a soft smooch on the green man's cheek: In the same spot she had a year ago. "...I thought you might need to renew." He gave Raven a fanged grin, and the two headed toward The ECO: Raven's favorite spot to hang out and be depressing.But she wasnt going there depressed.And with any luck,she wouldn't leave like that either.  
  
"Your food will be here shortly." The waiter moved away,leaving the two to their chat. Beast Boy started:" What I really want to know is what you've been up to,Raven." What was she going to say? "I've been sobbing my head off thinking of you?" No,that wasn't right. " I was catching up on stuff I couldn't do when you were there?" no,that sounded cruel. She finally found the perfect response:"not much." The waiter placed their food in the center of the table. For Raven, a small salad with vinigret dressing and water. For Beast Boy,A Vegetable Crudeday and an orange slice. "...Thats IT? Thats all your having? You usually eat,like,10 plates each meal!" He had started on his petit salad when he answered: " I dunno.I guess I'm just...not to hungry." Not...to..hungry.....?? Beast Boy is ALWAYS hungry!! Even at night! He can't make it through one nap without getting up for a tofu dog! What surprised Raven even more was that Beast Boy was using a fork. Properly.Silentley.Creepy. Then Raven said something she wished she hadn't: " Wow,Beast Boy...you've changed so much." The second after it left her lips she knew it was trouble.She expected Beast Boy to get all defensive and try to convince her he wasnt different at all. " Yeah,I guess I am." He said cheerfully. ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... ... Raven said nothing. She was confused. " I...I normaly hate it when Beast Boy's messy and cheesy...but...this doesnt seem like him. Not at all. At that second,she decided to glance over at her "date"...And,of course,he decided to look up as well. Their eyes met. " ... ... ...Raven,...Is there...something wrong?" " No! Nothing...Everythings...great."  
  
I KNOW I KNOW!!! I can't just leave it there!!! Well,I can.And I will.And please don't worry! Raven is going to accept him soon enough. And I promise it'll be adorable. ^.^Until Chapter 5!! 


	5. embarrased,or not embarrased?

Hi ALL! Thanks to Tsunami Don, I plan on making the rest of my chapters in paragraph form!! YAY!!! and,i wrote this chapter whilst listening to very romantic,emotional music,no thats why it may be a little bit of over kill love love wise. ^.^It is also a little naughty. Be warned.  
  
Chapter 5: embarrased, and unembarrased  
  
Raven, smothered in blankets, was resting on her bedroom floor in a protective fetal position. She had her eyes closed tight,as if in heaven, never wanting to awaken. She was, indeed, dreaming. About the person she loved. The person...she thought she loved. " Do I really love him? Or is it all just a...dream..." She said sleepily. " I'm..scared. Beast Boy,I'm scared! Beast Boy!!!!!!" Tears began to flow from her dead eyes, like rivers of sorrow. " I'm confused. I'm alone. Your not here. Where are you? Do you...hate me now?" She was nearly chocking on her tears,which were dripping into her open mouth. A gargling sound came from her lips,and she awoke. "....D..dammit. Another night without any sleep...ever since he came back.  
  
....This isn't his fault. It's mine. It's all...my fault." She got up,and like a zombie, put on her normal clothes. She felt so unclean. She was fine, but it seemed like she was covered in soot and filth. This upset her greatly. She decided to take a quick shower before facing the fate that awaited her downstairs. She has always liked her water very cold, but today,she felt hot water was best to get her "stains" out. As she massaged her regular pommagranite shampoo into her hair, she started wondering. " What am I to do? I am not the person I used to be. I have changed, just as he has. These daily things never used to trouble me...why does it seem I cannot stand them now? What is so different about myself?" The water felt refreshing, and Raven seemed very content in her soak.she didn't hear the door opening.  
  
" ...Ew. My fingers are getting all pruny. This offers me no more comfort. Just one more scrub and I'm out of here." Raven's legs were shaking. This confused her: she did not feel a chill, and she was not nervous. She just...sensed that there was something there. Then she heard it: humming. Not just any humming: Someone was humming the tune to the Posidon Adventure. Now,Raven was well aware that everyone in the tower had seen this movie: They had gone together 2 years ago,when it was playing at the Neptune downtown. She had unpleasent memories of it, But seemed to recall that someone was quite infatuated with it. He bought the mugs,t- shirts,comforters,pillow cases... EVERYTHING. She knew only ONE person would ever hum that tune after being so overexposed to it: Beast Boy.  
  
" No. No,no,no,no,no!! Not NOW!!!!!" Raven panicked as quietley as she could. She started to cry, but stopped herself. "Stop that!! This is no time to be crying! Now THINK of something!!!" She cautiousley opened the sliding glass door. Sure enough,It was him. He looked quite chipper for this early in the morning. " Uh. Another thing I don't think I'll ever get used to....I can't go out now!!! He'll see me for sure! ... I know! I'll yell to him!" She took a deep breath and shouted: " BEAST BOY!!Get out of here! I'm taking a shower!!!" ... ... ...Nothing came from him. She took another look. He was wearing a cute pair of yellow headphones. They were obviousley on full blast: Raven could see they were gyrating. She also saw him mouthing the words to several songs,which would he adorable in just about ANY OTHER SITUATION. Then she saw it: A small,plastic tap that said: "Water-proof." She was stunned. " Crap...why did I get him those for christmas!!! If he hadn't gotten me such a nice sweater...gah!! This sucks!!!"  
  
The busy BB was not just listening to music: He seemed to be preparing something. Raven nearly died when she saw he was getting out his normal shampoo: Cucumber Avocado Splash. He did not take the headphones off,as Raven predicted,And started undressing. Raven's face grew red when he removed his shirt,belt and pants. She tore herself away as he removed the last article of clothing. She could hear Him grabbing the bottle and slowley walking over to the shower stall. She tried desperatley to cover up her body with her hands,but alas,like most humans,she had but two. "Oh no...He's going to see me...naked...and He's gonna be naked....crap....this is...the worst." She braced herself as she heared the door open. She huddled down onto the floor. She waited. And waited.And waited. Soon,she grew both concerned and wierded out. She got the courage to open her eyes.  
  
Beast Boy was happily "dancing" in the small box: Bubbles covered most of his body. Raven had obviousley not taken into account Beast Boy's enlarged figure: He had not seen her on the floor when he walked in. He was turned around,Obviousley having tons of fun. Raven breathed a sigh of relief,until she tried to plan how she was going to get out." Surely he will clean all the bubbles out,exposing me!! What can I do??? " Raven did the only thing she could do: She Softley motioned to the bottle of shampoo,which turned pitch black. It was outlined in white. Carefully,she held it above his head: Near his hair. With a reluctant burst,the shapoo bottle exploded,sending green goop everywhere: including poor Beast Boy's eyes. " Ow! God,what happened??" That was Raven's cue. She crawled as fast as she could on the ground and out through the glass door. She then ran out of tthe room in a flash,unwillingly leaving Beast Boy in pain. She sighed. " ...Geez.That was...hellish." She had forgotten about the rest of the titans,who were walking down the hall,towards Raven. She saw there shadows and screamed. She ran back into the bathroom, slamming into a hurting Beast Boy. They both fell to the ground. Hearing the noise,the team ran to see If all was well. " Raven?? Are you alright? We heard you scream,and-  
  
There on the floor were Raven and Beast Boy. Both completely naked,both rubbing their heads. Raven was the first to recover: though her eyesight was still a bit blurry. " Oof.That was painful..." Starfire, for once, did something right. " raven! Um...uh...your room is on fire!!" Raven recoverd completely: "WHAT??!?!?" Starfire led her out of the room,leaving Robin, Cyborg and an unclothed Beast Boy in a very messy bathroom.  
  
" I swear,Starfire: If you ever pull something like this again..." Raven was clothed again, and sitting on Starfires plush couch. An ashamed Starfire sat next to her. "I...am sorry Raven. I thought "on fire" meant ..how you say...." cool? Nice? Hip?" Raven was not satisfyed. " ...So you ran into the bathroom to tell me my room is cool??!?!?!" Starfire was silent and in thought for a few minutes. "...No,your room is a bit too frightening for me." Raven was,for the second time that day, Stunned. "So, you came into the bathroom to tell me my room is cool, but not really." Starfire looked torn. " Yes.I am terribley sorry,Raven." Raven stood up and walked out of the room,with an air of disgust,leaving Starfire to her sad self. Meanwhile,Beast Boy was asleep in his own room,still a bit dizzy and confused from the events that had taken place. Robin slowley walked in. "...Are you feeling better,Beast Boy?" He asked. "....Shampoo...BOOM...screams...Raven...naked..."  
  
Robin looked a little disturbed. " I...think you'd better rest some more. Heh heh...maybe a LOT more." He left Beast Boy and turned out the light. Soon afterwards,he met Raven in the hallway,also going to the boy's room. Her head was spinning. " Oh god...what just happened? Did Beast Boy see me? Did the others see me?? What if they ALL saw me??? Shit." She slowley opened the door,like a mother would do to the door of her baby. She saw the sleeping giant, snoring away, a small puddle of drool on his pillow case, His long ears somewhat drooped. She walked over to his bed and sat down. She kissed his forehead. He smiled, a single fang sticking out of his funny lips. He looked like a sleeping kitten. "  
"...Maybe you haven't changed too much." She gave his tummy a tiny scratch. His legs went crazy,his mouth opened,his toungue started panting. Then,he fell back into a soft dream land. This action pleased Raven greatley.She did it again,this time,accidentley waking her "toy". " Not again! Geez...I've collapsed,like,3 times since I came back!" Raven just looked at him. " He drinks herbal tea,and he doesn't fool around,but..." She hugged him. "...I think I can get used to this."  
  
ThAts the end of chapter 5!! The EnD OF the StorY?? I NO thiNK so!!! Theres still a lot more to come. The others will get some more talking time,and...lets just say Raven hasnt found out the ways BB's changed for the WORST. The next chapter will kick ass,but will be very bloody. Be warned. ^.^ 


	6. Untouchable

Thanks for the reviews! Here it is-the sorta long awaited chapter 5!! This chapter is VERY bloody. Be warned.* It also has some language. -_-\ Also be warned: THIS CHAPTER IS VERY SAD.DONT READ IF YOU CANT HANDLE EXTREME SADNESS.  
  
Chapter 5: Untouchable  
  
" Raven? Beast Boy? Starfire was bustling about the house when she heard the doors open. Before too long, she heard 2 doors closing in unsion. " Oh my.The 2 must be back. How delightful! I shall tell them of all the fun adventures I have been having here! Lets see." Star started pacing around in circles. " There was the small, flat piece of metal I found on my bedroom floor.( Quarter ) .That strange piece of brown glop under the cushion.( Old Banana ) And oh! The small, multiple legged invertebrate I discovered in my hair! ( Spider ). Happily, she floated over to Ravens door. Feeling naughty, she pressed her ear up against the door before knocking. She heard strange noises. " Oh my.I wonder what Raven is doing? Perhaps she is.moving furniture?"  
  
.Raven was moving something, but it wasn't her furniture. Lying softly on her plush bedding, Raven and Beast Boy were busy doing what Raven had wanted to do for a year: kiss. Beast Boy's warm body and soft lips relaxed her into a state of tranquility. She moved her lower lip across his. * This.this is a kiss? I always thought it would be terribly uncomfortable and boring.* She gave him a big one. " But that's hardly the case." She tried to smile,but before too long, she felt a terrible,sharp pain on her lip. Gasping,she pulled away,attracting Beast Boy's attention. Her pale hand reached up to feel the injury. When the hand came back,It was covered in blood. She gave a small scream. This caused one of her windows to shatter, throwing bits of glass all over the floor,Making her bed an oasis of safety.  
  
" My lip." Beast Boy saw her wound and gasped as well. A thought entered his mind: he hoped it wasn't the case,but tested it anyway. His shaking hand reached up and brushed several of his fangs. Expecting the worst,he brought it back to find it was also drenched in blood. Raven was bleeding uncontrollably, and without a word,she quickly jumped off the bed and ran to the bathroom. Beast Boy tried to follow her,but lost his footing,and unknowing of the glass under his feet,was stabbed with several large pieces in his foot. He yelled and fell to the ground, gathering even more shards on his face and back. Starfire had seen it all. It had been fast and frightening,but she had seen it. Raven had hit her nose with the door on her way out,so she was consistantley rubbing her nose. She decided to go see Raven in the bathroom. She did not see Beast Boy on the floor.  
  
Raven was pressing a cold compress to her lip. She had to hold it high,so the blood would flow back to her heart. Her broken heart. She tried and tried to keep the tears at bay,but they simply would not stop. She was crying for so many reasons: Her lip was searing with pain, she was in denial about her relasionship,Her hair was a mess.In an instant,her toothbrush had exploded. She knew it was hers since it was black with a little feather on it. *cute* Starfire walked in on her sob-fest. Raven quickly collected herself. " Oh. Hi Starfire." Starfire looked worried. "Is your lip ok?" Raven was silent for a few seconds. ".I'll live." Star decided to get it over with. " Raven,I understand how difficult it is to deal with Beast Boy's." "BEAST BOY!!" Before Star got in another word, Raven was out the door. " ..My,that was simple."  
  
Raven's tears were streaking across her shocked face. " how could I forget about him??!?!" She stopped in front of her open door. " Beast Boy, I'm so sorry. I forgot-" Beast Boy was on the floor, sobbing silently. Raven could see the blood flowing from his forehead and mixing with his tears. His back was a dark scarlet color. His arms were covered in cuts.His legs.were not recognizable. His eyes were blank. " .No." Raven screamed. "NO!!!!!!" The entire tower shook from not just her powers ,but the scream itself. In the kitchen, Cyborg and Robin thought there was an earthquake. Starfire was fascinated with the colored towels at the time and did not notice. Raven had lost it. Her eyes were blazing a clear white. Her fists were clenched. Tears were not enough. The entire wall was blown away, exposing Ravens room to the city. The roof slowly began to tear. Beast Boy spoke:".Raven."  
  
Immediately, all the shaking stopped. She looked down with terrified eyes at his blood stained face. " Raven.I'm ok.I just.need.a.d..o..c..t...o..." No more words were heard. Raven lifted his sad, bloody body up and out the open wall. " Hospitals.Hospitals.where the HELL is the hospital??!??!?!" Before she knew it, a small post office had blown, scattering letters like leaves.She finally saw the Red Cross. She followed it like a final light. Rushing past all,everything,carrying her loves tattered body,she screamed at the receptionist:I WANT A DOCTOR!! NOW!!!!!!!!!  
  
The terrified receptionist took a phone into her shaking hands. " Emergency! Blood Transfussion needed immediately!! Maximum blood loss!" The nurse motioned for Raven to sit. " You must wait here." Raven looked at her with Trigon eyes. " NO. I'm NOT leaving." The nurse was surprised,but stern. " Look,If you refuse,I WILL call the authorities. SIT." Raven, eventually,sat. What was she to do?Her head bowed,she prayed for Beast Boy's safety. All the time she could hear him screaming as they removed the glass shards. Screaming. She wanted to scream too. Scream so loud everything but her and Beast Boy would just fall away. Free of sickness and Sadness. They would be so happy together.  
  
. . .  
  
Raven had dozed off. A nurse lightly tapped her shoulder. " You may see him now,dear." She was suddenly wide awake. "Is he ok? Is he hurt? Will he live? If you did ANYTHING,I will tear you limb from-" The nurse had ran away in fear. Not bothered, Raven hurried to him. * faster.FASTER,feet!!* She did not open his door: She knocked it down. There She saw him.Her own, covered in bandages.all she could plainly see was his face. He looked content. She could not tell if he was asleep or not. Despite that,she sat down. She HAD to keep her emotions inside. She could not hurt Beast Boy .A doctor soon came in.  
  
Raven ran to the medicine man and screeched: " IS HE OK?!?!?!?!" The doctor stayed calm. " ..He's lost several quarts of blood.but his condition is improving,and I think he'll be fine. He just needs some time alone." Raven looked crushed. " Does it.have to be alone?" The doctor looked at her in thought. ".If you don't mind my asking,what's your connection to the patient? Raven stood her ground. She did mind, but knew she would be trusted if she came out. She had to see Beast Boy. ".I'm his.wife." The doctor silently backed away. She opened the hospital doors. She saw her boy sitting on a bed, under yellow blankets and a purple heating pad at his big feet. He looked terribly pale, almost dead. A big sack of blood was attached to under his arm. He looked like a mess. She sat down. ".The world doesn't want us to be happy. But I don't care. I want to be happy.I have to be happy. And I need you to be.happy." She was escorted put by a sweet nurse,leaving the boy to lis misery. Raven could do nothing.  
  
THAT'S IT!!!!!!!!!!! MWAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I think I'll stop the story here!!! FOREVER!!! WAHAHAHHA!!! . Ok,no. I'll add the next cute-tacular chapter tomorrow: thanksgiving. Happy turkey day,everyone!! And please Review~~!!! Tell me what u want to see~!! 


	7. Bakin a cakeercookies

Chapter 6: Bakin a cake..er..cookies.  
  
It was Christmas time at the Titans Tower. All around the building were globs of snow that covered all the normally sunny, green grass. The air was always nippy and bitter: The sky was perpetually white, with grey sprinkles, like pepper on mashed poatatoes. Though it was freezing outside, it was fairly warm on the inside of the titans home: and it was properly decorated to boot. Starfire had never experienced the holiday before, so she went crazy the first few minutes, throwing cottonballs all over the place and eating all the popcorn string. After she was under control: thanks to Robin, the team decorated every single nook and crany with a dolie,a snowflake or a candy cane. Every room, that is, except Ravens. This was normal, Raven never did ANYTHING to her room, but it that wasn't why it was undecorated. Raven had locked the door from the inside 2 days ago. She did not make a sound. She did not come out. Everyone thought she was in there crying her eyes out, but they were wrong.  
  
Raven wasn't crying. She wasn't even that sad. She just.felt like she didn't want to see anyone. She was tired out from everything: Beast Boy was injured, she almost got arrested, She still didn't know if anyone had seen her naked either. Her poor head was throbbing. " Ow.my head hurts. Figures...I've been.busy. Maybe its time I went out. I could.hang ornaments? No. I hate to do that. I could always just sit there.like I always do.And watch.Fun." She plopped down onto her floor. She saw a book near her hand. She opened it, curious as to what it was. It turned out to be a cookbook she had found in the basement last year. " Too bad I can't cook. I bet Beast Boy would like some cookies.He likes.sugar cookies.Hmm. I wonder if Starfire can cook." Raven imagined for a second what cookies made by Starfire would taste like. She cringed."Ew.maybe not. Robin?...hmm..no.he's a guy.Maybe.Cyborg? Cyborg.he's part robot.he's gotta know SOMETHING about cooking. I guess.it's worth a try." Raven smiled at the thought of Beast Boy eating some of her cookies. They had to be the best cookies EVER.  
  
Downstairs, Cyborg was depressed. The GameStation was useless without Beast Boy around, Robin was in the gym and Starfire was relaxing in the kitchen. She didn't understand videogames anyways. The door swung open. He turned around happily, hoping it was Robin: but it was only goth girl. " Cyborg. Do you.wanna help me with something?" Cyborg was dissaponted it was not his other friend, but replyed: " Um.that depends." Raven held the cookbook out to him. He looked it over. " Do you know how to cook, Cyborg? I wanna make Beast Boy some cookies. If you help me.." She knew she would regret saying this:"I'll.play Gamestation with you." Cyborgs eyes lite up * literally* And he stood." I guess that sounds like a fair deal. C'mon. Lets go to the kitchen." " Aw,but I wanted to bake cookies in the living room." Mumbled Raven. Cyborg ignored her.  
  
"Ok,Ray, first things first." Cyborg's arm did some fancy turning, and in a few seconds, a small sink stood in front of the psychic chick." . Um, okay." Raven reluctantly washed her already pristine clean hands, eyeing Cyborg curiously. " Ok, I'm squeaky clean. Now what?" She asked. Cyborg grabbed the yellow cookbook." Ok, lets see here. Um.how does: Ultra Sugar Cookie Triple Batch sound? Says it makes 234 cookies." Raven was speechless. " Um, I'm not sure Beast Boy will want THAT many." But Cyborg was already getting out the supplies. Raven sighed in frustration. " Ok, First.we grease the pan."  
  
30 minutes later  
  
After some disgusting work, the two titans had their cookies ready to go.Raven had written "Get Well Beast Boy" On some of them in green icing. Both of the friends were covered in a thick layer of all-purpose flour.Cyborg's midsection made a hissing sound that startled Raven. It slowly took shape of a tiny oven. Cyborg placed the cookies on a blue tray and set them for half an hour. Absentmindedly, He started singing:  
  
" Dum dee Doo.hmm hmm hmm.put in da flour, da suga, da 3 pounds of yeast."  
  
" wait-what was that last part?" Raven stopped the cheerful song with a worried look on her face. "Uh, I said: put in da flour, da suga, da 3 pounds of yeast.Why?" The purple haired girl had a " this is SO classic" look on her face. Before too long, the hinges of Cyborgs stomach oven were starting to rattle loudly. Soon, a nasty yellow paste began to seep out of the cracks in his sides." Um, oops?" Raven was about to kill Cyborg when his oven blew, splattering buttery sludge EVERYWHERE. Starfire had decided to come and see what was happening when she heard the loud blast. She was quite satisfied with the rooms new look. " How beautiful!! The colors are so pretty! *lick*.and they even taste good!!" Starfire started biting off one the walls when Raven really DID start killing Cyborg. Luckily, Robin also came into the war-zoned kitchen." What the heck happened??!?" he yelled. Starfire ran up to him and shoved some yellow gloop into his mouth.  
  
" Try some, Robin. Isn't it delightful?" Robins face certainly didn't look " delightful". It looked like he had a pound of uncooked batter in his mouth. He coughed it all onto the floor, depressing Starfire but pleasing the rest of them. " Heh heh.just uh,.doin a little home ec?" Raven chimed in. " Mr. Easy Bake Oven here was helping me make cookies for Beast Boy, when he stupidly put 3 pounds of yeast into the batter. Typical." Robin saw Raven's sad face. He walked up to her. " Raven, it's ok. We'll make another set of cookies, ok?" He smiled at her. She gave a small grin. " Thank you.friends." It was a long night for the titans, but after 2 rotten batches, Raven's cookies came out just right. She couldn't have been happier with the result. She looked up at the clock. 5:29. " C'mon. They'll let us in to see Beast Boy any minute now.  
  
The team took the T-car over to Jump city: to Beast Boy's hospital. The sky was black, but the stars shined like diamonds. Starfire had brought the changling a comic book and a ball of yarn ( c'mon: it's Starfire.) Cyborg had an N-Gage for his green bud, Robin had a basket full of fruits,chocolates and other food, and Raven had her huge plate of cookies, wrapped in green cellophane. She also had a purple envelope with his name on it, and a picture frame with two sides. On one side was a picture of the team at the beach: and on the other side was a nice picture of herself. " This is the only picture in existence of me smiling." She thought. ".He's the one who should have it." The 4 friends walked into the large room. Warmth immediately returned to their fingers and toes, making them all feel relaxed and happy. There were several familys there visiting their relatives and friends. It was a wonderful sight. There was holly everywhere, as well as a few huge wreaths that made the whole building smell like peppermint. Raven did not feel frightened anymore.  
  
" Excuse me" Raven asked the nurse. " Were here to see Beast Boy.". The nurse looked very puzzled. She flipped through a pile of note cards,and then spoke: ".Who,dear?" Raven asked again, getting annoyed: " Beast Boy. He's green? Kinda hard to miss?" The nurse looked relived. " Ah, you must be talking about Mr. Logan. He's in.Room 324. 10th floor,dear." It was Raven's turn to be puzzled. She questioned her fellow titans when they were in the elevator." Guys, whats with this " Mr.Logan" stuff the nurse was talking about? I didn't know Beast Boy had a last name." The others shrugged. " I have always called him Beast Boy." Said Starfire. " Yeah. I mean, I guess I just never really thought about it."replied Robin. Raven wasn't satisfied. ".Guess I'll just ask him tonight." The elevator stopped: 10th floor. The gang started down a long corridor: There were so many happy sounds: laughter, cheers, hugs,kisses.It was hard to believe it was a hospital. It was more like a party.  
  
" Room 324.Here it is, y'all." The door was covered in drawings. " Mr.Logan: Get better soon! Thanks for being my friend! - Andrew." " Mr.Green: Have a Merry Christmas! I love you! - Michelle" " You're the coolest! Show me some tricks when you get better,ok? - Lance" " Hope you see your family soon! You're my best friend! I love you! - Lulu" Some of the pictures had a green body surrounded by hearts, or a paw print, or a sun: all sorts of nice things. Raven was rather confused. " What.is this? Who are all these people?" Her curiosity got the better of her. She opened the door slowly, for fear that the fuzzy man was asleep. He wasn't, he was standing at the window, looking out at Jump cities wonderful scenery. His long ears heard the door open. He turned to greet his friends. " You guys came!" he exclaimed. Beast Boy was looking as good as new. Even better: He looked the best he ever had: And very happy, like it was his birthday. He gave Starfire a friendly hug, and started conversing with Robin and Cyborg. " So, has it been weird back at titans tower? I was gone for a whole month,after all." Cyborg spoke up " It was pretty strange. We'll be glad to have you back." They both smiled. Starfire held something out to Beast Boy. " Uh.Thanks,Star." He unwrapped it: It was a cup filled with yellow,gluey glop. Beast Boy tried his best to look grateful,but it was difficult. " I call this " Cookie Glue". Raven and Cyborg were going to through it away, but I felt so bad doing that.so I saved some and brought it to you! I put some mustard in there for flavor." Beast Boy took the cup reluctantly. Starfire waited patiently. ".Go on, try it!" Beast Boy gave her a weak smile. He closed his eyes and took a lick. It tasted like hot rubber, but he grinned and thanked the alien girl, who was quite proud of herself.  
  
" Here ya go,B. Your own N-Gage. Thought I'd get myself one.but I'm kinda like a BIG N-Gage." Beast Boy laughed and took the device gatefully. Robin was next." Here, Beast Boy. I thought you might get tired of hospital food. I know you like chocolate, so I put some in too." The green guy started drooling slightly." Yum.man, the food here's ok.but this looks soooo good! Thanks a lot!" Robin back away, revealing his princess: Raven. His eyes got big and his ears perked up when he saw her beautiful face. She stepped forward shyly, and placed her confecionary masterpiece on his lap. " I..we made these cookies for you.There sugar. I.know you like sugar.so,uh.I made-WE made some. . . . yeah." She tried to back away but Beast Boy caught her hand.She looked surprised,until he pointed to the other things she had in her other hand. She laughed; embarrassed. " oh yeah.that. Um, this is a picture of us,at the beach last year." Beast Boy grinned at the memory. " And,uh.on the other side is..me." She turned the plate over to reveal a picture of her and a genuine smile. The green guy was shocked. " Your.smiling? In a picture?? This has to be the only picture in existence of you smiling!" Raven got a little steamed, but let it go. " I'll keep it somewhere safe. I wouldn't want to damage such a special frame." He placed it on his currently bare medicine table, and stood up. " Anyways, they let me out of the hospital tomorrow.so, I guess I'll see you all in the AM! Can't wait to celebrate Christmas together!" Everyone had forgotten about Christmas. The thought brought smiles to their faces. " Of course! We must make snow angels, and tiny buildings made of hardened molasses,and."Star trailed on as Robin and Cyborg hurried her out of the room.  
  
Raven sat next to her boy for a minute. ".I'm sorry your in the hospital. It's my fault. I hope you can forgive me." The shape shifter gave her a sweet, pepperminty kiss. ".It's ok." That's all they said. She gave him one more big, Beast Boy hug, and left. The man sat at the edge of his bed and started reading his card.  
  
Dear Beast Boy-  
I hope you like your present. It took me a long time to choose. Anyways, I was just writing to say hello, just thought I'd check in. Didn't want to take up your time at the hospital so.Oh yeah!! Um,When we get home.do you think you could tell me your name? Your real name? I don't know it, and I thought maybe I'd get to know you a little more if I did. If you don't want to tell me, that's ok too. Anyways, I'm glad all this is over. I can't wait for you to come home again.  
  
Love, Raven  
  
Beast Boy remembered the first letter Raven had written him: before his trip: before all these changes. " my real name.my name.Raven, It's Gar. Garfield Logan.  
  
W00ty! Sucky ChapPter!! Im SOoOOOOSoosoOSOOSOo sorry it took me so long: I was sick over thanksgiving. Anwyays:next chappty is Christmas! YAYY!! 


	8. confessions

It took me sooooooooooo long to update! Im so sorry!!! This is a sad chapter.I'm sorry. And to Ken Akamatsu,the writer of "Love Hina",Im soooo sorry for stealing the diary scene!! Im sorry!!  
  
Chapter 8: Confessions  
  
It was a bleak day in Jump City. The town showed no movement whatsoever,not even a breath. The hospital was the only place you would hear anything at all. Beast Boy was finally being released from the clinic. His blood had been replaced and he was fit as a fiddle. *sorry 4 the cheesy saying.-_-* Before he could get out the door, He felt tugs and pulls on the bottom of his slacks. He turned around to see several children: no older than 5 at his feet. One had several bandages, one was on crutches, and one was in a wheelchair. They all looked terribly depressed and concerned. One of the small girls spoke to him: " Are you.leaving us, Mr.Green?" You could tell she was fighting back tears. The green boy 's face soften and he knelt down so he could she her eye-to-eye. The girl couldn't hold it back anylonger, and she started to cry. Beast Boy wrapped his long arms around the tiny girl and whispered in her ear: * I promise I'll come back. I'll bring you all sorts of things to play with.I promise. Ok?* The girl reluctantly let go of his soft neck. She was still frowning,but the tears had stopped. "Mr.Green" lightly planted a small kiss on her rosy cheek. Another girl and three boys stepped forward. On of the boy had several patches and a robotic arm. " Yo, BB! My plates come in on Thursday, and I get to pick the color. Can I get green ones, so I can be just like you?" He smiled. BB and the boy hit kuckles. " Sounds good." The boy ran back to the matron excidedly, and started talking to her as they walked back to the ward.  
  
A dark girl with a cast and a boy in a wheelchair started saying farewell. " I wanna have another tea pawty wit-you, okie, Mr.Logan?" The girl held a plastic teapot. " Wouldn't miss it." The girl smiled, revealing a mouth with 2 teeth missing. The boy looked angry. ".I'm gonna beat you one day. So.so don't get too smiley,Green~!!" The boy started pouting. BB looked happy, but stern. ".Keep practicing. Maybe one day you WILL beat me.heh." He chuckled at this. The boy looked only somewhat happier. At long last, the green guy made it out of the hospital. He transformed into an eagle and started heading toward Titans Tower.  
  
"Ok,everyone.ready?" Raven,Robin, Starfire and Cyborg were standing in front of the giant T, each on of them dressed nicely. Starfire was bouncing happily, Robin was trying to calm her down and Cyborg was checking his diagnostics to make sure nothing was wrong. Raven,however,was looking her finest. She was wearing her normal outfit,of course, but it was obvious that she had given her hair fine highlights. Her skin glew with happiness. She had a sincere smile on her lovely face.Her clock was eggshell white, as was her leotard. She looked simply gorgeous. For the 1st time in her life,she held a compact mirror and checked her face again and again. Finally, she and the rest of the team began to fly towards Beast Boy's hospital. Just as the 4 were fluttering off, a green eagle flew in through an open window of titans tower. Once inside, The bird changed back into the green man. He looked around the room. To his surprise, the room was very dark. There were lots of strange looking books on all the shelves. The only light came from a faded lantern on top of an old,mahogany desk.  
  
It suddenly became frighteningly clear where he was:Ravens room.  
  
.Meanwhile,at the hospital, the Titans were somewhat dumbfounded. The receptionist checked,checked and checked again. There was no "Beast Boy"currently in the hospital directory. "Well.maybe he left." Supposed Star. Raven shook her head. "No.he wouldn't leave without us." But her face expressed doubt. She was not only worried,but also a bit angry. " Why? Why did you leave? Ugh..this is so perfect." Finally,after a few minutes of waiting,Raven walked out of the clinic. The others followed her. Together,they thought the only places he would go were the pizza place, The arcade or.Titans Tower,though this seemed unlikely,since they had just come from there. " Star will search the Pizza Place. And Star.please.TRY not to get distracted." Starfire didn't respond. Raven finally looked up to find that she was staring at the sky. Raven gave her a push. "oh--? What?" Raven sighed. "Robin.you better go with her." Robin nodded silently,then blushed just a bit when he saw Stars beautiful face. Ok.Cyborg,you go to the arcade,and I'll go back to Titans tower in case he comes back. Got it?" Everyone understood. "Ok.um..Titans go,or whatever." Raven started levitating back to the huge T-shaped spire at a slow,sluggish speed,obviously crushed and spacey.  
  
"Aw man.I gotta get out of here.she's gonna kill me." Beast Boy make a frantic dash for the door. In the process he knocked a few notebooks off Raven's nightstand. This attracted his attention. He saw one of them was violet with gold lace. It said on it:  
  
Diary: 2003  
  
Beast boy gulped. His hand started to reach for it when his conscience stopped him. " Beast Boy.BEAST BOY! What are you doing?? If you read that diary and Raven finds out,you'll be right back where you started- Raven thinking you're an immature jerk who can't sit still. You.can't lose that respect. " His hand pulled away. He quickly scooped it up and started to place it on the bookshelf. His fat fingers accidently got caught inbetween 2 thin pamphlets. He groaned,and tried to jostle them loose,accidently causing the diary to land on the ground with a thud. The pages fell apart from each other,revealing a short entry by Raven that she wrote the day after he had returned.. His conscience had nothing on his extreme curiosity. He lifted the book silently and started to read slowly.  
  
8-12-2003 Diary-  
  
Beast Boy came back today. I missed him a lot. But He's.not the same at all. In fact,It's like he's a whole other person. Its.almosts scary. And I don't know how I should feel. I still love him.? But.Do I need more? Maybe.do I want him to- The page ended. Beast Boy was already sweating like crazy,his heart racing like a child on his first doctors appointment. He reluctantly flipped the page.  
  
marry me? Yes.that's what I want. But.He'll never love me that much. I guess.I should just give up.I guess I'll stop seeing him. I don't want to get hurt.not again. I know. I'll do it.once he gets out of the hospital. God,I cant stop crying,so I guess I'll go to bed. I don't want to get you wet.  
  
-Raven  
  
Beast Boy was the one who made the diary wet. It's hard to imagine a full grown ( ? ) man weeping over a girls diary. Especially a green one.  
  
"What are you looking at?"  
  
If Beast Boy could cry any harder,he would. He knew who was talking to him. He stood up and tried to collect himself. His eyes were still red from his sobbing. He stood face to face with the girl of his dreams. " You.Beast Boy.How could you..?" Raven looked sincerely crushed. Beast Boy looked like He might wring her neck. He held the page out to Raven. ".Whats this,Raven?" Raven recognized the page. Her eyes got narrow. "What is this?? What IS this??? How dare you.How DARE you! Why would you do this to me? My only place of secrecy.and you. You took that away? I don't understand!" Beast Boy showed no emotion. ".So,you never want to see me again?" Raven cringed. "I.I never said that!" She started getting closer to him. "You didn't have to. Its all here on this page." Raven took the diary and started re-introducing the concepts to her mind. When she was finished,she dropped the book like an anvil. "I.I was just confused. So I wrote it all down. Everything I felt. So now you know. Now you know everything. I hope your happy." Before Beast Boy could react,Raven's fragil hand smaked him across the face. The incredible inmpact sent him recoiling. He lay on the ground,clutching his wound. He sat up slowly,as if just struck by an arrow. He got to his feet and limped over to the purple haired girl. His face showed nothing at all. " You.make me sick." Beast Boy didn't touch Raven,but he couldn't think of a way he could have hurt her more. He staggered out of the dark room and down to his large dwelling. Raven stood,dumbstruck about what had just happened.  
  
"I make him sick? I make him sick.sick. Of course. Everyone would admit I make them sick if they could. This is.all my fault. I had everything and I now have nothing. Nothing at all. Not even beautiful memories to visit. Her in the dark." She curled into a fetal position and sobbed herself to sleep.  
  
SAD!!!!!!!!!! I know,short chapter,but hey,I'm a busy person!!! So,until next time.um,that'll be next time. Ok. 


	9. the trigon seed

Chapter 10: The Trigon Seed  
  
Raven was laying on her lovely,plush bed at the moment. Her head was spinning,her hands were sweaty,her eyes shut tight. She could hardly believe Beast Boy had seen her diary. The nerve. " I should be angry at him, and I am..." she paused for a second. ".but why am I also sad? So he knows I was going to stop seeing him. Big freaking whoop. It's not like I was really seeing him in the first place.he just.I don't know anymore." She fell onto the floor, lifelessly; like an old rag-doll. ".Maybe.I should apologize. Yeah. That'd be best. But.what do I apologize FOR? What did I do? Still,I feel like.I can't go on like this. I have to tell him how I feel,or he'll never know." After a few more moments of self-pitying, The telepath got up and made her way to the top floor: Where she had seen Beast Boy several times at this hour during the past few days. Every step she took was like lifting a 50 lb.brick. Eventually, the young girl made it to the top.  
  
The view from the 5th floor was gorgeous. You could see all of Jump city. From the Hive Academy all the way to downtown. There, leaning on a railing,was Beast Boy. His eyes were tired, his body seemed soggy and unwanted. Afraid of what awaited her, Raven approached the resting man. His sensitive ears quickly picked up her footsteps,and he spun around,surprising both of them. Beast Boy's face went from surprise to gloom. ".what do you want." It was more of a statement than a question. Raven stood her ground. ".I just wanted to talk." Beast Boy was not satisfied. " About what." His face still showed no emotion. Raven looked a bit sad. "Come on,Beast Boy. I just want to explain-" " Explain what?" Interrupted Beast Boy. " You don't have to explain anything to me,Raven. You don't want to be with me. End of story." He started to walk away,but Raven caught his hand. Without thinking, Beast Boy squeezed his hand tight, digging his sharp claws into Raven's pale flesh. She screamed, and pulled away. She inspected her small wound. 5 rather deep cuts were visable on her lower palm. Hurt quickly turned to anger. " Don't touch me." Scoffed the changling. Raven had to hold back the urge to slap him. If she did, He'd never listen. " Beast Boy, I'm Sorry, ok?!? I understand that your mad, but you can't do that to me! You have to give me a chance! .What happened to the old Beast Boy? . MY Beast Boy? The cheerful,kind,gentle Beast Boy? Why is it so hard to see how I feel! Your completely different!! At first I thought it was only your body.but your mind has changed too! It didn't seen like you were any different.but.Beast Boy.what happened to you? What made you become so cold? Why." She was dripping tears by the time she had finished.  
  
"." Beast Boy just stood there, towering above the person he had onced loved. His eyes were sharp and mean. Raven cringed when she saw his face. ".I just want to understand. I want to help.please,just give me a chance to listen." She could see,just for a second in his face, the soft, caring Beast boy she remembered. But soon his expression returned to nothingness. " You don't understand." He tried to leave again, but Raven stopped him again. This time, however, Beast Boy growled at her, revealing his terribly sharp fangs. She cringed, but did not let go of his hand. He quickly gave her hand another glass squeeze, making her squirt small amounts of deep red blood. But she still did not let go. She gave the surprised man a deadly look. " I'm not letting go, Beast Boy. Not until you listen." Beast Boy's face slowly became softer. He started shaking slightly,looking as if he may vomit. He choked something out to her:" .Raven.What wrong with me?" With no warning whatsoever, Beast Boy's face scrunched up,and with a "hkkakkkk!!" He spit something out. It looked like a small, grey blob, but it was hard to see through Beast Boy's trade-mark slimy slobber. As if not stunned enough, Raven glanced up at her boy to find he was shrinking slowly. His eyes were closed peacefully, as if in a deep sleep. His entire body shrank quite a bit: bigger than when Beast Boy left, but not incredibly humongous like he was. His clothes became baggy and unfitting. He re-gained his soft face. His eyes were no longer hard and cruel, but they were as Raven remembered them: Loving eyes.  
  
The smaller Beast Boy fell to the floor with a soft thud. Raven could barley breathe. " What.the hell just." She didn't let her mind continue that thought, as she was instantly at the small boys side. She placed her hand softly on his chest to see if he was still alive. She gave a sigh of relief when she felt his strong beating heart. Before long, she realized that she had no idea what had just happened. " What was that gross grey thing? And.why did he shrink? Ugh.my head hurts." Raven rubbed her throbbing temples while Beast Boy rested his head in Raven's tender lap.Soon, Raven had dozed off, leaving several unanswered questions and a whole lot of disgusting slobber on the carpet.  
  
CLIFFAY!!! Yes, u will find EVERYTHING out in the next chapter. Please R&R! and until next time! *which will probably be in 2 or 3 days.* 


	10. oblivion

Chapter 10 *really this time!!*- An ordinary world  
  
Beast Boy felt rather strange.as if he had awoken from a deep sleep. He felt drained,sort of dry. As if he was a juice box a greedy little girl had sucked up in seconds. Drowsy and still tired he also felt: But Beast Boy felt something else: true. He felt clean, as If he had just taken a shower. All his memories of days past were sketchy and unclear: Like a lovely dream. All he could remember was Raven's concerned face: her silky skin and glittering eyes. He smiled at the thought of her wonderous presence. Before long, he noticed he was sitting up next to the girl with violet hair. He looked over at her, seeing that her face expressed little or nothing at all. She seemed content enough, but the green boy could'nt help but feel concerned. He finally lifted his arm to shake her awake, but noticed that it felt limp. He gave it a look, and to his surprise, it was no longer a large,muscular appendage, but rather what looked like a limp soup noodle. Not too worried, he lifted his shirt up, revealing something he never expected: flatness. Nothing but flatness. A boy's chest. A boy's tummy. Beast Boy was just a boy again.  
  
He could feel a tear run down his chubby cheek. He whispered something under his breath, in a cracked,broken voice:".He's gone." Raven stirred in place. The small boy glanced over at the heavenly woman. She wore a happier expression that earlier. He forced himself to give off a weak smile. He began talking to himself,very quietly: " Why? Why did he leave me? I had it all.I,I.Raven.she'll never like me like this. Never. To her I'm just a scrawny little piece of nothing. Just a bug, waiting to be squashed. I've been like this for my entire life: Shunned by all, not just because of my green complexion, but my tiny size. Then, finally, I meet him. He finally made my dreams come true: I finally had a chance with her. . She could finally see me as something other than Beast Boy . She could see me as Gar. Who I really am! . But now, It's back to triangle 1." (A/N: like Square 1?) Raven had become restless, and slowly,gently,she sat up.  
  
She glanced over to see her boy: Beast Boy." She thought. " He's.finally back." She scooched closer to him. He gave her an innocent,broken look. She placed her hand on his and spoke. ".I guess you want to know what happened here." Beast Boy was surprised Raven knew what was going on. " .What's going on,Raven?" His voice was young again. She looked around, and then lifted the slimy grey morstle. ".This is a Trigon Seed. It's how my father stays fresh. When My anger runs low, He starts starving. You would think this would eventually kill him, but It's not that easy. Without my knowledge, Tiny Seeds form all over my body,Mainly in places with large amounts of moisture. The seed.It doesn't exactly "brainwash" a person.But rather it speaks to the person's mind. It scourages through all of its thoughts, trying to find the thing that is most important to the person. Once it does, the seed controls the persons reason for love for that thing. If it's a person, obviously it causes the person to become someone who would make the person happy. This may seem like a wonderful thing,but this is only meant to build the hosts emotions up,making them stronger. That's when the seed starts truly working. It changes the powerful emotion into anger. With the trigon seed in control of that much anger, it can cause the person to do terrible things. If you had not realized what I was trying to do, the seed would have continued to grow, and would eventually take over your entire mind. . this is the HAPPY ending."  
  
"No." Beast Boy finally spoke. " This isn't a happy ending. Now.now everything is lost." Raven kept picking at him. " What are you talking about? Your back to your old self!" That was a mistake. Beast Boy turned around, trying to conceal his anger. " Now,me and you.we don't have a chance." Raven was surprised. " Is.is this about the diary? I told you.I'm so sorry.I didn't mean-" " No. This isn't about that." Raven was both relieved and curious. "Then, what is it about?" She tried to hold his hand, but he pulled away. He turned to face her sad expression. He wore a frightleningly cocky expression. " Look at me! I'm Beast boy! Woo Hoo! No one takes me seriously! No one cares what I think! I'm just a distraction! I'm just for entertainment! No one knows how I feel!! All RIGHT!! Boo-ya!! Go Beast Boy.Go Beast-" He couldn't finish. He still wore his vain expression, but tears were pouring from his eyes. Raven couldn't stand to see him like this. " Beast Boy.Is that how you really feel?" He kept on smiling,but his eyes were shut tight from the rivers that poured from his red eyes. " Yeah. I do. I.I don't..I don't wanna be.your jester." He completely broke down. He was on the floor, weeping into the carpet.  
Raven was scared,but she attempted to comfort him. She knelt down to the crying boy sweetly. A wonderful scene, If you were watching it from afar. "I don't think of you as a jester,Beast Boy. You're a funny guy.your sweet and your kind." He slowly lifted his tear-stained face to meet her tender one. ".But Raven.How do you feel about me?" Raven was taken aback. What a strange thing to ask. "I like you,Beast Boy." She said innocently. Beast Boy countered. ".But that's all. You only like me. You know why? Because I'm just an immature loser.But.With the trigon seed, I was something more. I had the power to enjoy tea! I had to power to talk politely! I had the power.to be something other than the Beast.I was.finally someone worth going out with.someone worth loving.not this."  
His throat was scratchy, as if someone had scrapped a fork in it. He did not resume bawling. He looked at Raven truly. She was at a loss. " And you think I won't take you seriously,right?" The changeling was surprised she was so abrupt with this statement. He nodded in agreement. Raven's eyes glowed with love. She took the trembling boy into her kind arms. He continued shaking. She whispered into his pointed ear: " Beast Boy, I understand." And that was all. Beast Boy couldn't understand how she couold possibly understand, but he was still comforted by this. They continued their embrace for a long time, until Raven pulled away and spoke again: ".You wanted to be something better. You thought I would love you if you were more polite." Beast Boy added: ".And taller." He blushed. Raven gave him a cozy look. "Beast Boy.I love you. For you and you alone. I'd love you the same if you were 10 feet tall. It was nice when you were bigger and more mature.but not if it means you aren't true to yourself." She kissed his soft lips. "You'll grow up eventually. Trust me. And I'll still love you. I'll always love you.ok?" Beast Boy could see sincerity was seeping out of Raven's eyes. He held her close. She happily lay there,snug against his boyish chest. ".I love you,Gar. Forever and a day."  
  
That's iT!!! Well,Almost. I'm still gonna write an epilogue. So you have SOMETHING to look forward to. Anyways.I hope you enjoyed it, and be sure to watch out for my 2nd BB/R fic later on: "Green is my favorite color." Thanks again to people like goldenhawk24 and amskitty for making kick ASS BB/R fics. I'm not worthy! Anyways,Hope you like it,and I'll see you all later!  
  
Whitemetal 12-28-03 


	11. Epilogue

EPILOGUE  
  
-Titans Tower. A place where you would find many different types of people. Big, Small, Strong, Weak.But they are all heroes. This is something I am sure of. I know why they do what they do now. I am enlightened by this experience. I hope everyone gets a chance to see these magnificent people one day.-  
  
"So,that's who that chick was that was always hanging around with you,huh,Ray?" Titans Tower. The place we all know well. Inside the tower,2 figures were seated at the kitchen table. One of them was a gorgeous woman with tidy purple hair,the other a tall,regal man with a kind face and loving green eyes. " Who did you think she was??" Beast Boy gave Raven a dirty-minded look. In response to this,she hurled him across the room,despite her small stature and his large size. He came to after a few minutes of self-pity. "Dude.how could you throw your own boyfriend? You really do have a heart of stone." The woman gave him a scoff in his direction and resumed reading the paper.  
Before too long, two more members joined them in the large cookery. One was a tall,elegant red-head and the other a black-haired male of 21. " Ooo-I see you two have seen our newspaper debute." The two nodded in unison. " Wasn't it nerve racking,having some geeky high schooler follow you around for 5 days?" Raven shook her head. " Not really. All she did was ask me a few questions."  
"About what? About WHAT??" Beast Boy pressed his face close to hers,trying to be intimidating. She ignored this action. ".about all of you." Everyone gasped. " WHAT?!?! Why didn't you have US talk to her??" The green guy was getting defensive,but Raven kept her cool. " Um,maybe because Robin was on that "Self-discovery" trip in Eu-rasia,Starfire was visiting home,Cyborg was recharging and you were still unconscious from eating the thanksgiving turkey??" For once,Beast Boy didn't have a come-back,so he limped away from his perch. She thought she heard him mumble something about "Tryothophane". Raven also stood up. " Well,that's enough reading for one day. See you all later." She started to walk away. She saw BB out of the corner of her eye,standing close by,not budging. She turned to face him. ".Aren't you coming?" She acted irritated but he could tell she was just faking it. ".sure." The two walked up the lengthy flight of stairs to the second level,while Robin and Starfire stayed wondering what they were going to do. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
The changeling closed Raven's door silently behind him. " Ok,Ray,what did you-" Before the sentence was over,Raven muffled his lips with her own. Shocked at first,he soon took the action in stride. "This is what makes me happy." Thought Raven. " Damn,she's cute." Thought green. After a few minutes of bliss,Raven pulled away.Her cheeks looked flushed,but she had a smile on her face. She led BB to her bed,and they both sat. " So,It's Friday." Raven stated. " Do you know what day it is?" Beast Boy was stumped. "Um.It's your birthday." Raven congradulated the thoughfulness of this answer,but replyed "No." He tried again. "It's.Christmas?" Raven smiled weakly and replyed with "no." once again. The shape-shifter snapped his fingers. "I got it!!" She smiled. " .It's Cheeseburger Friday at McSkipples!! W00t! Oh YEAH!" Raven punched his arm,ending his momentary happiness.  
"You numbskull!!" She hit his chest several times before his arm caught hers. She growled. She hated it when Beast Boy won their "fights". ".It's January 10th." BB was still confused. ".So?" Raven decided to just let it go." Ugh! It's our anniversary!!" Her face was red with exhaustion.Finally,Beast Boy got it. ".Oh yeah!!It is,isn't it? I know I wrote that down somewhere.guess I should have written down somewhere that I wrote it down somewhere.." He started scratching his head. Raven heaved a sigh of frustration and leaned on his shoulder. ".What do I see in you?" BB heard this little notion. ".I heard that." " Well,I said it pretty loud,didn't I?" He was about to get mad when she sat up and smiled. "It's been 5 years. Everything's changed. Me,You.Star,Robin,Cy-.well,he hasn't really changed at all." Beast Boy had to laugh. It was true. In 5 long years,Cyborg hadn't changed a bit: physically OR mentally. But Beast Boy had changed. As had Raven. But this change was for the better.  
She rested her hand softly on his shoulder. "..Raven?" Beast Boy's face became serious. Reluctantly,Raven responded:"..Yeah?" ".Even if I change,even if the whole world crumbles beneath my feet,I'll still love you." She could feel his heart beating quickly. " You know I'm just fooling with you when we fight,right? I mean.I don't really hurt you,do I?" His eyes were concerned and soft. ".I know. We just have a bit of an unorthodox way of showing our love." She kissed his cheek. ".But then again." He grinned at this comment.Both of them lay back onto her sofa and slowly felt sleep overcome them: Raven cluthing to his orange shirt for warmth,Beast Boy enjoying the feeling of her sweet body next to him. Both of them were happy with how the world was moving around them. Or maybe it was moving through them. Only the tower truly knows.  
  
-As a final note,I'd like to thank everyone who reviewed my first fic. Ecspecially WarpPrince:Your kind words make my day. Thank you all for reading my work. I'd like to do an alternate ending,since I just saw "How Long is Forever?" And thought I could do a nice fic. But poor BB! Fat and bald!! T_T I'll have to change that.So,for the last time,I love all your reviews,support and suggestions! Teen Titans Go!  
  
Whitemetal 1-11-04 


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